Oct 6th. Staying out of the house.

I awake. There is no one in the house. I can breathe. Thank god I have a coffee date with Walter.

I manage to stay out of the house all day.

The question relates to the root of the problem with my brother and sister in law. I asked the mother in law a question that was not meant to be asked. I had forgotten what English culture really means. 

Keep a straight face, stiff upper lip. None of that emotional delving. Please.

The question

I find a club in my hand
not a feather
I meant to prise open
soft and slow
to allow you to unfold,
not to smash you 
into this submission
violated
- red -
in sudden exposure.

Three wonders filling me with gratitude:
1. This morning I met with Walter W. Boyd Jr. who gave me a wonderful healing session in the middle of the coffee shop Costa. Yes! I learnt that all I am projecting onto the outside world, is of course, coming from within, and not finding a home is actually not feeling at home in my own body. Something that I can work on right now! Thank you Walter for being tribe, for resonating me back onto a firmer path.

2. I splashed out and gifted myself a lunch in a cafe.As the salad arrived John and Anne Kathryn Bruce called and I had lunch with them over skype! Afterwards the waitress came across and spoke to me like we were old friends, long enough for me to get a crick in my neck!!! We had a right good chin wag about living out of the system and gardening and going slow and working less, and I suddenly realised that I really am not alone.

3. It was really nice to go to chanting and meet new people, to connect to good inside to empty space, to trance out a little...and to be in my body without all that monkey mind...and when I got home, I found a message on facebook from a new friend who has hopefully solved my housing problem!!! Wonderful! I think that I can go and live in a meditation center!!!!! I am so happy. I'm feeling so good about staying open during particularly difficult times. THANK YOU UNIVERSE!!!!

From Walter
I awoke this morning and I was asked to pass this to you, its an image I received from my healing transmission last week."I give myself full permission to be true, safe and comfortable with myself and within myself."